Next cometh Autumn with the sun so hot and piercing...

[light_of_the_world]

Back home, the court moved. Breguswith had explained it to Hild once, when she was a child and adamantly against such constant travel. She wanted to stay in a place long enough to learn its habits, to discover its secret places, to feel it with her whole skin. But as her mother pointed out, a king could not remain in one area for so long, not if he wished to keep his thegns in line with his powerful presence and keep his court from eating those thegns out of house and home. And so they had drifted from castle to castle, following the shifting seasons, keeping time with the different vills. Bebbanburg, Yeavering, Tinamutha, once, Brough, Sancton, Goodmanham, York.

But time did not need a changing landscape to move on. Hild found herself on the cusp of fall, without York, for the first time in more than a decade. Darrow did not have York's sweet apples or pears, nor its wars. It did have something called a pumpkin spice latte, however, which was almost as delicious as the overexcited barista had told Hild it would be. She had ordered two if only to calm the woman, but she had reasoned that anything that garnered such praise, mostly earnest, had to be passing good.

Balancing a tray of coffees and a few scones in one hand, Hild texted a few of her friends with the other, inviting them each to join her in the park, if they had the time. The first to arrive could have the spare latte. So she said. Hild had every intention of ensuring that each of her friends could share in the pumpkin spiced goodness.

Comments

[youfeelluckypunk]

He can't disagree with her there, the term really doesn't encompass all that Luke means to him or what they are to each other; but it's one Reid is nevertheless satisfied enough with and unless Luke tells him differently, he has no real problem continuing to use it.

"You're right," Reid tells her, ducking his head to hide a laugh, "but neither of us have come up with anything else so I suppose it'll do for the time being."

It brings a flush of pleasure to his cheeks to hear that Luke had worried about being a good boyfriend when he'd already had flowers in hand, and Reid fondly rolls his eyes because there hasn't been a moment since they'd shared their first kiss that he's wondered if they'd made the right decision to be together. He'd wasted weeks fretting over whether this might ruin their friendship or make things awkward between them but when Luke's lips had met his, every concern had simply disappeared. In that moment, he'd felt like nothing existed but him and Luke.

"I think that's what he means by wanting to be a good boyfriend," Reid says, brow furrowing in thought as he taps at the side of his cup. "It's like how I would hope to be a good friend to you. In truth, it is about hoping that we're good to each other. There was an author named Elbert Hubbard who said that 'a friend is one who knows you and loves you all the same.'" He offers Hild a shy smile, shrugging a shoulder. "That seems to be the way I judge my own friendships. The people who stay after they get to know me are the friends worth trying for, the ones worth keeping."

[light_of_the_world]

In her own opinion, Hild thought the word "lover" was a perfectly acceptable term. But she could see how that too might pose problems, given that the English word "love" carried so many different levels and types of love. It remained one of the more confusing aspects of English. For all that it took and borrowed from other languages, it had not seen reason to take other words for love and all its varieties into its arms.

Hild considered Spencer's words and the quote as she sipped her coffee. The meaning seemed obvious and she agreed with it on first hearing, but she did not like to take Spencer's words, however quick they might be, for granted.

"Still I say, do the thing and do not waste time with the worry," Hild replied with a fond smile. "But these are good words. It is right to value more those that will stay by your side when you are at your worst more than those that flit in and out of your life. And by this you know that I will always be here to help you," she said earnestly. "Even when you might be a struggle. Not that I have seen this yet."

[youfeelluckypunk]

Do the thing and do not waste time with the worry.

He has to bite back a smile at that, though he nods as his smile widens, genuine in its affection. "I will do the thing," he promises, "and I won't waste time." Reid thinks he's getting better at that as the days pass. He'd like to hope so, anyway. The day Luke had brought him flowers, they'd taken another step in their relationship and while they haven't been intimate with each other yet, the way his boyfriend had touched him that evening had been unlike anything Reid had experienced before.

Granted, it's been a long time since anyone has touched him like that, but he doesn't think it could possibly have been the same with anybody else. While he's never disrespected the opinion of those who believe in fate, Reid has never believed it himself. Only once has he truly questioned whether there could possibly be a higher power, when he'd died those few minutes after what Tobias Hankel (Raphael, rather) had done to him, and seen the supposed light at the end of the tunnel. He's remained steadfast in his commitment to science and rationality but now, faced with the intensity of his feelings for Luke and the knowledge that this meeting couldn't have happened in their separate worlds, he wonders if he's really just been waiting all this time for this man.

It's a fleeting thought, one he doesn't need an answer to because what matters is that he is with Luke. If there's a bigger reason as to why, Reid can live without knowing it.

When Hild says she hasn't seen a worse side of him, though, Reid lets out a burst of laughter. "No, not yet," Reid says, "and while I hope you're never subjected to any of my mood swings, they do exist." For the most part, he thinks he's good about keeping them under control but when he's under a great deal of stress, when he's trying to keep his head straight in the face of something that hits him hard on a personal level, it becomes more difficult. He's never been quite as good at that as Hotch or Gideon or even Emily.

After a second of hesitation, he gives Hild a nudge with his elbow. "For you, I think I can muster the will to try harder not to be a struggle."

[light_of_the_world]

Hild took Spencer's words for the promise that they were, nodding her satisfaction that he would agree to her and her way of thinking. It was not a catch all idea, something to be applied to every situation. Hild knew this especially well, given that acting without worrying about the consequences would surely have seen both Hild and all she cared about dead, back home. But in this instance, with Spencer and Luke as enamored with each other as they were, Hild could not foresee either taking any action that would forever alienate the other. They had to take advantage of the window of opportunity that they had together.

Though she had yet to experience the reality of it herself, Hild knew, from reason and from stories, that the gods of this city could take them from their homes and, one day, bring them back to their homes. Or elsewhere. One day, Luke or Spencer, or both might disappear. They would hate themselves if they did not take advantage of every day, if they wasted any time with silly worries. Indeed, she had begun to absorb some of this thinking into her activities as well.

Hild grinned at his nudge, leaning over to bump her shoulder against his. "Give all your swinging moods to Luke, and leave the sunny ones for me," she said. "That is part of his duties as boyfriend, is it not?" It was only a tease and she knew that Spencer understood it to be such. She truly meant to be at his side should ever he need any kind of assistance.

"Though if that is the case, I wonder that many people do get into these boyfriend girlfriend relationships."

[youfeelluckypunk]

"I think you might be right, if such duties really do exist. Though being with him seems to make me consistently happier so maybe having a boyfriend will do away with all the bad moods entirely." The chances of that are highly unlikely, which is why Reid says it with a twitch in his grin, but he's honest when he says he's happier now. Hild can see that, he suspects, because even though he wouldn't say he's ever been a particularly morose person and is generally in good spirits, even Reid can say about himself that he does smile more now.

He smiles more because he thinks of Luke often, whether it's about something they'd done or something Luke had said or something they might do later, just the thought of his boyfriend is enough to make his eyes glaze over with happiness. Some of the detectives at the department have already noticed this, poking fun at him when he checks his phone to find a text from Luke and insisting that they should all go out to the bar together one night. Though Reid had adamantly declined--

(not out of embarrassment and not even because he doesn't want to have to think of his next excuse for why he doesn't drink but because he wouldn't want to subject Luke to the teasing that would almost be a guarantee)

--it'd still pleased him to know that the people he works with here seem to be just as happy about seeing him happy as his team had back home.

"And I can't speak for anyone else but for me, there's something to be said about knowing with certainty that there will always be someone I can turn to at the end of the day. For Luke, I would drop everything to help him if that's what he needed, and I know he would do the same for me. It's comforting to have that kind of security." There's also the matter of what an excellent kisser he is but that's something he thinks is better left unspoken.

[light_of_the_world]

It made Hild glad to hear that Luke made Spencer happier, as she thought the same true for the other man. But she felt a sharp emptiness in her chest even so, like the ache of having too little food to sustain one. She saw others' happiness in love, felt it, breathed it in like it was incense, heady and rich. It was difficult for Hild not to be happy when her friends were happy. Despite this, being in love was one thing that many of her friends had experience with and she did not. She had never had the time, never had the luxury of being able to fall in love. She was young by the standards of Darrow, but old enough by the standard of Northumbria. She had sex and enjoyed it, but as Spencer and she had discussed once, there could be sex without love. She cared, in some instances deeply, about those she had let share her bed, but she knew it was not the same. She did not know what being in love felt like, but she knew she had not tasted it yet.

Her smile would not falter. No dark shadow would pass over her gaze. She was happy for Spencer and not unhappy with her own lot. Only aware.

She nodded and dipped her head to consider her coffee cup, worrying the edge of the cardboard holder with her thumb. "I had something like that with Begu, my gemæcce. She was always to be there when I needed her, and even when I did not realize I needed her. It is good to have someone you can trust in so completely. To know there's no games at work with them."